


they're all that's left you

by afrocurl



Category: X-Men (Alternate Timeline Movies)
Genre: Honestly Charles What Are You Thinking, Introspection, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-X-Men: Dark Phoenix (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-23 09:28:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21317923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afrocurl/pseuds/afrocurl
Summary: Old songs from after he and Erik first met filtered into the forefront and he started to hum.
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr & Charles Xavier, Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 22





	they're all that's left you

Chess game long over, Charles sat at the Old Friends Cafe and thought.

He had been doing so much thinking that he found his mind whirling with too many ideas, but he had so much to process.

> 1\. He retired.  
2\. He no longer held the same political cache.  
3\. Erik had offered him a place in Genosha.

Old songs from after he and Erik first met filtered into the forefront and he started to hum.

-

Erik, as Charles remembered, was his truest friend and confidant. Perhaps moving to Genosha was what he needed after all.

-

“I’ve given your proposition some thought and I think I’ll join you in Genosha,” Charles said as they met again at this cafe filled with new memories. Old Friends. Peace. He had given himself a week to think on what Erik offered before he made this choice.

“You won’t object if I take some time to pave the way for your arrival?” Erik asked, though he must have known that Charles had nothing else to do and would wait as long as necessary.

“Meaning you need to make sure no one objects to Charles Xavier moving to Genosha?”

Erik let out a laugh. “I suppose that’s one way to think of it. But I had to explain what happened to Selene and Akiri; it’s still too new for me to suggest a new telepath for the island.”

“Not to mention I might need Cerebro rebuilt.”

“That would be too much power for Genosha just now.”

“For now,” Charles repeated. He was hoping that they could build one later, but right now it was a slow process. He was an unknown to people who were naturally distrustful of someone that had his reputation.

“For now. We’re rather happy to be left alone and the island isn’t capable of holding scores of new mutants in the coming weeks.” Left unsaid was that Cerebro would increase the population if Charles found any number of mutants with it.

Charles started to understand. He was no longer going to be the same Charles he had been three weeks ago. He wasn’t even sure who he wanted to be.

What was he without his school? Without his access? Without his fame?

He might need to take time and figure that out before going to Genosha.

“I understand all of that. Take whatever time you need; I need to sort out a few things of my own.”

-

Charles decided that if he was to understand himself --without the artifice of Charles Xavier Leader of the X-Men-- he needed to go somewhere away from all those trappings.

Oxbridge felt like a lifetime ago, but it was well before he thought of himself as one savior for mutants like him.

He might as well try that.

-

As soon as he started to move off the train into the busy station, Charles felt his life reorder itself. He was one man in a sea of many, and dressed down as casually as he could, he felt like no one.

Perfect.

The towns were much the same, and as he wheeled around, he found himself missing those days of drinking while also trying to write his way through his thesis. Yards of beer were not something he could manage these days, nor did his palette like that taste now.

But as he looked around, he found himself missing Raven --the young woman in her mini skirts and knee high boots working for shitty tips-- and the guy who fell headlong into a journey for other mutants.

Perhaps this trip wasn’t without its flaws.

-

While he had left Erik alone to sort out Genosha, Charles still needed some means to reach Erik and check on all the progress. Somehow they set up a system that Erik would just get himself to Atlanta and call Charles at his hotel, long distance and international costs be damned.

It all seemed far fetched that Erik would have to leave Genosha to make this call, but there were some telling reasons why the island was so isolated and insulary. It was a haven, and had been created with minimal other citizens removed to make it mutants only. The small island on the coast had been a vacation resort, but the government had deemed it fit for Erik’s tastes and needs.

Regardless, they had a time and a place established for news each week and Charles found that these calls were some of the most engaging conversations he had had in ages. To be sure, he and Hank had discussed policies of the school and issues of education and training, and he and Raven kept battling each other about what the X-Men should be doing, but Erik left much of their larger issues off when he called.

“I think the island will be ready in a week or so,” Erik said one night. It was raining, enough that it had ruined Charles’ plans for time around Oxford soaking in the old city, old memories. Though the rain was its own memory -- lazy days with kettles of tea and fires, blankets and tomes of fantasy literature to occupy the hours away.

“Oh, so what have you done to make it Charles friendly?”

“You’ll have to see when you arrive. I’ve been working with a few of the mutants here to make a new place for us while also taking the time to talk to everyone about what work you’ll be doing.”

“I’m going to be limited, I imagine.”

“You’ll have to introduce yourself to everyone and see more of what we do before things could change.”

“Understood.”

“I think you do,” Erik said before he wrapped up the call.

Charles had a place to go, and some work to do. It was something that he felt was due at this point. He thought of himself as someone different; old memories of Oxbridge helping to reimagine his life, his purpose.

-

It was still novel for Charles to get on a plane from London to Atlanta and not be alone for the ride. Spoiled by that small plane and Hank’s constant need to follow Charles around were now long gone. Commercial flights were something in the 90s that hadn’t improved with time.

As they were, Charles was still in his seat before everyone else, but he was no less likely to drink away his fears because getting into an airline toilet was out of the question. Private flights had been a nice perk, but he was well aware that the world was looking for less of the Charles Xavier who had saved the world and more of someone else.

But, in a few hours, Georgia’s summer heat would surround him, and he would also be soon on a smaller flight to Genosha.

Charles understood, after weeks away from all of his previous work, that he had been a bit foolish to think the world would always accept mutants. Too many times had he been proven wrong, too few times had he been proven right.

Even with Genosha as a safehaven, there were too many mutants who struggled, too many who weren’t afforded access to the School, so many living in poverty. He had lived in luxury and had assumed the world was similar, but he was sure that wasn’t the case. Too many students had come to him from other situations, yet they were forgotten as soon as they arrived and absorbed into the larger School community.

Maybe he would be better suited to help those in Genosha now, knowing how hard it was for him to adjust to less status and more humility.

-

Erik had chosen to meet Charles at the arrival gate, though they also needed to stay the night before their helicopter would take them to Genosha. It was a nice gesture to spend a night with Erik -- alone -- in a hotel room. They hadn’t shared a room in twenty odd years. Not since the first trip to Paris.

“I hope you don’t mind the night in the hotel; while I’ve made improvements to our place in Genosha, the hotel room will be much nicer than anything we have there.”

“You did take into consideration the bedding I need?”

“Of course, I did. But there are certain amenities that we aren’t provided on the island.”

“The large bathtub?”

“You got it in one, Charles. So, let’s enjoy a night with the tub and a good meal.”

“You and a tub? I’m shocked.”

“Much about me has changed since the Pentagon and Egypt. I appreciate the finer things when I know there are rare and precious.”

“This is your way of saying I’m not going to be spoiled any longer. Fair enough, let’s enjoy.”

-

As much as Charles had known his relationship with Erik was different today than it was a year ago, let alone ten, twenty or thirty years ago. It was hard to recognize this new Erik with all those other memories.

Erik was overly polite as Charles wheeled his way into the baggage claim, to the point where Charles wondered if something else was off.

They had avoided all talk of anything from Cuba, or the Pentagon, or Egypt or Westchester or New York City in their phone calls. As if they were not going to talk about any romantic tensions that have followed them for years. It was clear that Erik was putting the present and future above the past, though Charles wasn’t sure he was ready to do the same.

Charles can tell himself now that they were on a push and pull that could have resulted in the two of them falling into bed together when they met in the 1960s. But that was thirty odd years ago. Erik had been married, had a child, while Charles had run a school, nurturing so many minds. They were not the same men.

While Charles had taken the time to sort of his life away from Westchester, he hadn’t had the time to sort out what he and Erik might be. He was working on not being Charles Xavier, mutant rights’ activist, but he hadn’t thought of who Charles was without that. Could he take the time to have a relationship? He was only a private citizen with little influence. Would the world care if two mutants were gay and in love?

Was it the time to ask as they were about to share a hotel room and living quarters? 

“You look lost in thought,” Erik said. Charles had been thinking over much as the luggage came and went.

“I think we need to talk, at dinner, before we see the room.”

Erik gave an odd look, one that said he hadn’t imagined they had much to say without the comfort of their room, but nodded.

“I know the restaurant is passable,” was all Erik said before Charles’ luggage appeared. Errik just lifted it with his power even if the only metal was from the zippers.

“Then we’ll talk and see the room after.”

For the first time, there was a knot in Charles’ stomach that had nothing to do with meeting the rest of Genosha, but in discussing their lives together.

-

“I appreciate all the work you’ve put into helping me move to Genosha,” Charles started.

“But--” Erik filled in.

“Yes, that. But what are we to each other? Friends? Something else? I’m staying with you in your home, and I don’t know what everyone in Genosha will think of their leader with Charles Xavier.”

“You have a room to yourself on the bottom floor in my place, Charles. I have no expectations that we’re more than friends.”

“Fooling yourself already, then,” Charles said.

“How so?”

“You mean to tell me that you forgot how much we flirted in the 60s? How much we drank and charmed our way through recruiting Angel, Alex, Darwin and Sean?”

“It was a lifetime ago.”

“But that doesn’t mean any of those feelings have changed. I know you felt something then.”

Erik sighed. “I might have, but we’re no longer those men.”

“It doesn’t mean we won’t fall back into those old habits. My feelings haven’t changed.”

“You’ve had a strange way of showing it, then. You treated me like scum in the 70s, but seemed to accept that I had moved on after Egypt. What do you really want, Charles.”

That took Charles by surprise. He had sorted out some of his finer feelings, but hadn’t imagined that Erik’s had changed much.

“You’ve been hot and cold for years, Charles. I accept that you’ve given and moved onto others when the time calls for it. I’m offering nothing romantic now.”

“Well thank you for clarifying that. I’ll try to be less of a bother in Genosha.” This was going the wrong way already, and Charles needed to have Genosha. He needed a purpose. He needed someone who expected him to work. If not, then what was he? A retired activist with no power and no influence.

“I didn’t say you were a bother, Charles. You’ve had so much change in such a short time, I think you still need more time to sort out your life.”

“You’re not rejecting anything else?”

“I don’t know if that’s what you really want, but I’m here to help you navigate a new life. Let’s not complicate a new change with another that doesn’t need to happen.”

Charles let those words filter through his mind. It was true that there were myriad changes in his life right now, and that Erik was a strong presence in his life all these years.

“I see your point. Thank you for clarifying before we head up into the room. It does change some of what I had assumed at the airport.”

“I won’t betray you as I did before, Charles.”

Erik seemed to want to stop the conversation there, so Charles did.

The tone did leave Charles with more to think about, though.

-

One the helicopter from Atlanta to Genosha, Charles pulled out an old Walkman that had been left by a student years ago. It provided some distracted from the engines, but it wasn’t enough.

Charles had found one tape on a trip through the school years ago that didn’t seem to fit most of the students’ tastes. Maybe it was Alex’s or Raven’s. But it was something that reminded him of those first days meeting Erik and that First Class.

“Old Friends” was a song that described his and Erik’s relationship, and its last stanza felt so apt.

His old friend was all that was left him.

-

With a careful flick of Erik’s wrist, Charles was in Genosha, the short flight mired by his maudlin choice of music and his still confused mind about his relationship with Erik.

All of Genosha was around them as the helicopter idled while luggage and supplies were off loaded. They all looked at him awkwardly until Erik spoke.

“We’ve a new member in our community who needs support. He’s our new recruiter, and no his old ways aren’t our ways, but he knows what we’re planning.

“Welcome him as you would anyone else.”

A nod, and Erik moved his hand to have Charles move away from the helicopter and onto a nice little lane paved to let Charles move easily.

“Welcome to Genosha,” Erik quietly added as they followed the lane towards the largest structure.

“Thank you,” was all Charles could say, looking at the rest of his new community eyeing him with interest.

“You’ll be fine, Charles. Just work on searching and reaching out for mutants in distress and everything else will sort itself out.”

“If you say so.”

“I do, because in thirty years, my life has just done that; sort itself out. Now it’s your turn with a new outlook.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Xim and a few others for their help with this and to all the folks who helped to make other parts of this possible.


End file.
